Dec 1

Not out of the woods of my recent neuroses, but have been taking steps in the right direction. Its funny that this should happen during the time of Advent. In the Christian church this is a time to prepare the way for your master. To be ready when He appears. Metaphorically they are speaking about repentance and preparing your mind and soul for Jesus second appearance as savior. It is also a perfect time for self reflection; a spring-cleaning, if you will. As Bill W's friends would say, this is a perfect time to "take inventory" and clean out the clutter.

We all have regret, guilt and dismay from time to time, and most of us do well at containing those breaches in our emotional barrier. This week, it was hard for me to do that. I felt as if a "Perfect Storm" of emotion hit and I was overwhelmed.

I miss my family so much more than I thought i would, and now am falling into the pattern of not being able to come up every weekend like before and it is crushing me. I KNOW Alex is disappointed, I KNOW Valarie thinks I am playing games, but i am not. I just have always been a magnet for unusual events.

Anyway, this is my roundabout way of apologizing for whining the other day. I have to go get ready for work, Remember, the lord giveth and the lord taketh away, so those skills, items, thoughts you have today may be gone tomorrow. God Willing.

Peace.